I believe that the best advice would be to talk to an attorney before you make any decisions that will affect the rest of your life. Talk to an attorney before you discuss divorce with your spouse. Talk to an attorney and find out about your options and find out what you need to be prepared for as you proceed with the divorce.
What are the options available to someone facing a divorce?
One option is to do it the traditional divorce route, which is the litigation route. One party files the divorce action and the parties proceed into court with a temporary order. Then they move to discovery, and attempt to settle the case by informal settlement conference. If that is not productive then typically proceed to mediation. It can be a court ordered mediation or it could be an agreed upon mediation. Finally, it moves to a trial if the parties cannot reach an agreement in the mediation.
Another option is to handle it in the collaborative divorce process. This is where everyone sits around a table and both parties and their attorneys, reach an agreement that they will handle it in the collaborative process. When handled in that process there are joint team meetings where the parties and the attorneys and any neutral professionals who are hired will determine how to proceed and will make decisions together.
Is one divorce method better than another?
The collaborative divorce process is one that most parties appreciate, because they are in control. The court is not in control of them. The parties are able to work out an agreement on terms that they decide, knowing the facts of their case, knowing their family situation, knowing the situation they have with their children, and they are able to work it out with the help of the attorneys and with the help of neutral professionals.
Both parties typically appreciate the collaborative divorce process more because they are in control rather than being subjected to the court schedule